A romantic and sexual long term committed relationship with another human remains the greatest gift life can offer.

~ John Gottman

Fail or Succeed?

• Why do some marriages succeed while others fail?
• What are the building blocks to a satisfying and meaningful lasting relationship?
• What behaviors are more likely to lead to a marital meltdown?
• Does conflict hurt your relationship?
• Do emotionally-intelligent couples behave differently? What traits make their marriage successful?
• How important is friendship in your love life?

Imagine if knowing the answers to these questions could totally change the quality and longevity of your marriage. For starters, knowing what actions lead to a marital meltdown would motivate the opposite behavior to avoid that outcome. Even if you weren’t able to change harmful behavior in the moment, at least having awareness would bring it into focus.

And what about emotionally intelligent couples?  Knowing the attitude and qualities that resulted in a more nurturing and satisfying relationship would certainly be worth adopting.

Thanks to the rather brilliant and scientific research of Professor John Gottman which spans over 40 years, he has identified what makes relationships succeed or fail.

He revolutionized the study of marriage by using rigorous scientific procedures to observe the habits of over 3,000 married couples in unprecedented detail. John Gottman’s research informs us: “To have a happy marriage you need to do what satisfied couples do and avoid what distressed couples do.”

The happy satisfied couples he called the ‘Masters of Marriage and couples who were failing in their marriage, and eventually divorced he called the ‘Disasters of Marriage.’ But more importantly, John was able to identify the distinct behavior of both groups. He noticed differences in the way they interacted and related to each other.

So even if you don’t know the answers to the above questions, not to worry, I know a man who does! Along with his wife Julie Gottman, a highly respected clinical psychologist and educator, John and Julie Gottman’s groundbreaking work conclude that to build strong, satisfying, and meaningful relationships and negotiate the web of differences, disagreement, and conflicts, there are proven principles to that end.

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

The acclaimed culmination of four decades of research is transformed into John Gottman’s best-selling book The Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work to help couples build a basis for a happy and long-lasting marriage.

So what are the key findings of Gottman’s work?

Firstly, the research revealed that couples from both the ‘Masters and Disasters of Marriage’ had little differences in temperament, interests, and family values. With both groups, conflict was common and they tended to argue about similar everyday issues such as money, kids, household chores, sex, and in-laws.

However, where the two groups parted ways was the manner in which they embraced each other’s needs. The awareness and understanding of each other’s feelings and needs and honoring them is demonstrated by the ‘Masters of Marriage’ and found to be central to a strong, successful relationship. An abiding trait of emotionally intelligent couples.

With science-backed research, John Gottman was able to share with us what makes marriage work:

Cultivating a deep friendship
A distinct way to manage conflict
Creating a shared purpose and deeper meaning
The profound insights of his life’s work have been adopted into this highly interactive workshop that can divorce-proof your marriage and guide you on a path toward a fulfilling and happy long-lasting marriage.

Based on the concept of building relationships from the ground up, this 7-week online course will teach you what satisfied couples do in order to have a successful marriage and help you avoid the pitfalls of what distressed couples do.

Workshop Structure and What To Expect

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage work is packed with practical questionnaires (with high reliability and validity) and interactive exercises that I will personally and professionally guide you through.

Yes…the course is facilitated online by me from start to finish. You will have access to a live Life & Couples Coach, a.k.a. Michelle Williams and my promise is to create a safe and nurturing space for your learning.

“If you want to go fast go alone, if you want to go far, go together”. ~ African Proverb

This is a group process with other participating couples. Group learning is very powerful and the energy and collective experience can be life-changing and transformative as well as adding to your personal growth and to the growth of your relationship.  I will emphasize, however, that there is NEVER pressure to self-disclose or reveal personal issues publicly or in any way that you are not absolutely comfortable with. Your comfort is always my number one priority.

The modules cover a lot of valuable material but you will also have an opportunity to ask questions and receive real-time answers.

The workshop is held online once a week for two hours over a 7-week period. Classes are generally in the evening and always given in CST. When you sign up, you will receive the Seven Principles for Making Marriage Guide in the mail. The guide encourages reflection and integrates the knowledge from the Seven Principles book.

Grounded in the concept that friendship and emotional intimacy are core ingredients of a strong marriage and an important predictor of romantic and physical satisfaction your learning will include:

Enhance Love Maps

Deepen your knowledge of one another and become intimately familiar with each other’s world. The more you are known, the deeper your connection.

Nurture Fondness and Admiration

Happy marriages are based on a strong friendship. You enjoy each other’s company and express this with small gestures daily. Build and nurture friendship & trust to fan the flame of romance.

Turn Toward

Develop trust, emotional connection, closeness, passion, and satisfying sex when you turn toward each other instead of turning away.

Accept Influence

Taking each other’s feelings and perspectives into consideration and searching out common ground when making decisions. Understanding and appreciating each other’s needs in a way that honors and respects you both in the relationship.

Solve Solvable Problems

A five-step model that identifies solvable problems and how to solve them using strategies such as a ‘soft start-up’, ‘repair attempts’, and compromise.

Overcome Gridlock

Move from ‘gridlock to dialogue’ to understand your partner’s underlying unmet need. How can the unmet need or unfulfilled dream as Gottman describes it, be met?  By helping your partner realize their dream.

Create Shared Meaning

Tending to your inner life bonds your life together in a culture of shared purpose and meaning. By honoring each other’s values, philosophies, and dreams you are enriched individually as well as enriching your relationship.

The Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work strengthens your relationship and helps you add purpose and meaning to the life you build together.

Sign-up for this 7-week fully interactive online workshop facilitated in real-time by Michelle Williams, Life and Couples Coach.